Unresolved attachment issues can have severe consequences for children later on in their lives. It can prevent them from having and maintaining a healthy relationship.

British psychiatrist and psychoanalyst John Bowlby, the founding father of attachment theory:

Attachment is an emotional bond that impacts behavior from the cradle to the grave.

Safety and security is the main concern for children with attachment problems. They do not feel safe and tend to be distant. Their guard is up all that time it prevents them from accepting love and support.  Your child has to know that no matter what, you will be there.

Here are 5 ways to make a child feel safe and secure: 

1. Limits and boundaries

Predictability will make the world less scary. Limits and boundaries make a child understand what behavior is expected and what is and isn’t acceptable.

2. Control

You are in control. Be a voice of reason, remain calm at all times. Keep in mind that bad behavior means that your child doesn’t know how to handle their feelings and needs your help.

3. Availability

It is important to simply be there for a child. Especially after a conflict.  Be ready to reconnect as soon as they’re ready.

4. Mistakes

You will make mistakes. Own up to them. Sometimes frustration and anger can get the best of us. Nobody is perfect.

5. Routines and schedules

A familiar routine or schedule will provide comfort during times of change.

About Choices Psychotherapy

Choice is the foundation for a change. Choice speaks to the reality that there is not one right answer for all.  At Choices Psychotherapy, we are committed to empowering clients and their families to identify options while assisting in creating a personal roadmap toward health and recovery.

Related: ATTACHMENT ISSUES